Integration and Reconnection
Dear Friends,
It has been many moons since I’ve last written to you as it has been a very internal year for me. I have been intentionally slowing down, working primarily with elders and meeting some very young parts of myself that have been buried underground. As a result of this exploration, I am redefining how I would like to support others.
One thing is clear to me - that as long as we are alive, we have a precious opportunity to grow and change, to mature our humanity both emotionally and psychologically. And to deepen into our spiritual nature - the part of us that recognizes to a greater or lesser degree, that we are more than this body and the story of this lifetime.
Integrating these two parts seems to be the overarching theme of my life and what I’ve been attempting to write about in my current book ‘Becoming Fully Human: How Learning to Trust Love Saved My Life’. Through exploring what it means to ‘become fully human’, I’ve encountered parts of myself that I had ignored, parts that were increasingly demanding my attention, particularly through a chronic cough that has been resistant to the myriad of remedies I’ve explored.
The extent of my childhood trauma and the resulting PTSI (now termed injury, rather than disorder) became undeniably clear to me when I took the ACE (Adverse Childhood Experience) test. Even as I took the test, able to answer yes to every question, I was aware that I was also telling myself that my childhood wasn’t that bad, and many others had it much, much worse.
I have become aware of how I have often overridden these traumatized parts through a defense pattern named ‘spiritual bypassing’. This term was first coined by transpersonal psychotherapist John Welwood, who defined it as a "tendency to use spiritual ideas and practices to sidestep or avoid facing unresolved emotional issues, psychological wounds, and unfinished developmental tasks.”
Focusing on and deepening into my spiritual life has not been wrong. It has served me immensely and I believe, has inspired others along the way. Developing and sharing the practices of Partner Yoga has been a powerful part of my healing journey and one that was directly motivated by my difficult childhood experiences.
And yet, it seems there are no shortcuts to the painful work of facing and integrating the very parts of ourselves that can lead us to the sense of wholeness that I believe we all long for. To come to know that there are, in psychologist Richard Schwartz words, ‘no bad parts’ in us, only misguided attempts to protect ourselves from further pain.
We all long for the self acceptance of knowing it is okay to be just as we are, perfectly imperfect beings. And that the wounds we carry are not our fault, but they are our responsibility. It takes courage, self-compassion and perhaps most of all, a deep desire, to become fully human - to learn to love ourselves and each other both as we are now, and for what we desire to become.
I am deeply grateful to live in a time when I have access to so many truly transformative practices, medicines and healers. I know from my own experience that our wounds become our gifts as we become more willing to see clearly and feel deeply.
Exploring and practicing Savasana (Corpse Pose) and the impermanence of life has been one of my greatest teachers. It cuts through the ways we separate, deny and repress, and brings us back to what is most meaningful on this human journey.
Feeling safe and supported to explore the depths of who we are is something we all need. As 2024 ends and the new year comes, I would like to invite you to join me in some potent explorations in one or more of the following events. Each event will be a celebration of life and are designed to give us a direct, felt experience of our humanity and divinity, and our connection to each other and to all of life.
As always, I'd love to hear when what I share resonates, and am always open to questions and feedback.
With love,
Elysabeth
PS: I am clearing and cleaning my email list so please let me know if you would like to continue receiving this Newsletter. I recognize we are all inundated with information so no offense will be taken : )
PSS: I am in process of creating a new site and open to feedback or suggestions!
Upcoming Events
The Pleasures of Partner Yoga for Couples
February 21 -23
Kripalu Center for Yoga and Well-Being
More Info and Register Now
Exploring Death in a Safe and Sacred Setting
February 23 -26
Kripalu Center for Yoga and Well-Being
More info and Register Now
Savasana: Exploring Our Death to Liberate Our Life
May 15 - 18
Drala Mountain Center, Red Feather Lake, CO
More Info and Register Now
